30 September 2008

"Dream a Little Dream of Me"

I spent the night in Akula (a neighboring village, 3 miles away) last Friday at a friend’s house. It was a watch the foreign policy presidential debate(I actually took 4 pgs. of notes & then left them :-(), eat yummy food, play Settlers, talk about animal guides slumber type party. The next day Julie, Deanna, & I went for a tundra mossy, dip & bump kind of hike. We sloshed through some muddy spots, jogged a little, picked/ate berries, saw ravens, felt the crisp air, smiled in the sun, watched Lola have a blast, then went back & ate breakfast before heading over to a gathering at Akiuk for Oktoberfest. I recalled a dream I had the previous night while we were picking berries, which I totally thought was confirmation that I’ve been thinking about relationships & eventually love will find me again. Silly romanticism. The dream was rather short, but intense. You know the kind; those early morning dreams that make you want to stay in bed so that it can keep going. These are a few photos from the tundra trek. Lola is Deanna's dog.

Dream: A friend introduced me to a very attractive man. He was blond with intense blue eyes, an awesome face (I *am* a sucker for a cute face), and smooth creamy skin. He was proportioned & lean, wearing a white shirt & blue trousers. We met in one living room & then moved into another one where we were alone, sitting on the floor & talking. Our legs were intertwined as we sat perpendicular to each other, I kept adjusting & he was stable. There was a table beside me; a couch was behind us. We fell instantly into talking & had comfortable moments of silence. Now that I think of it, his eyes kept looking about, not like he was avoiding me, but as if he was conscious of our surroundings while listening. At the end, we were just laying with our heads on the floor, staring at each other & talking.

According to Alice, overall the dream seemed not to be about a relationship, but about this internal structure & a desire to learn about the world at large that I’ve been grappling. Some of these associations I already identify with & the others I’m semi-pondering. I could over-analyze things until I’m blue in the face. Though, most of the time with this sort of thing, I think “that’s cool” & go about things as I usually would. In short, I think I’m on the right path. Notice how there is sort of a 'self' theme, even though some images seem unrelated. I appreciate Alice’s insight. :-) Alice Anne Parker wrote all of the following associations & questions, found in her book “Understanding Your Dreams”.

Image – Associations – Ask Yourself
Friend – Aspect of self-ready integration. – What part of me is being integrated?

Male – Yang aspect of self. Assertion. – What action am I ready to take?
Adult – Maturity. Wisdom. Full size. – What part of me has grown up?

Blond – Glamour. Artifice. Frivolity. – What part of me wants to enjoy life more?
Hair – Protection. Attraction. Sensuality. – What am I covering? What do I display?

Eyes – Vision. Consciousness. Clarity. – What am I aware of? How do I see the world?
Blue – Harmony. Spirituality. Inner Peace. Devotion. – What is the source of my inner peace?

Face – Identity. Ego. Self-image. – How do I appear?
Skin – Surface of the self. Sensitivity. Connection between inner and outer. – What is on the surface?
Buttocks – Humility. Stupidity. Power. – Am I being an ass? What do I need to forgive in myself?

White – Purity. Clarity. Coldness. – What do I seek to purify?
Shirt – Upper, as opposed to lower, self. Emotions. – What feelings do I consider appropriate?
Trousers (blue) – Lower self. Passions. – What signals am I sending?

Living room – Central space of the house of self. – What is central to my being?
Floor – Foundation. Basic elements. – Where in my life do I want to create stability?
Table – Place of activity. – What am I ready to examine or to do?
Wood – Growth. – What is my natural form?
Furniture – Identity. Attitudes. Beliefs. – How do I furnish the house of my self?

Legs – Support. Movement. – What supports me? Am I getting somewhere?
Knees – Flexibility. Humility. – Where in my life do I need to bend?
Mouth – Nourishment. New attitudes. – What am I ready to take in? What am I ready to express?
Lips – Invitation. Communication. – What am I offering or what is offered to me?
Talking – Communication. – What am I ready to express? To whom or what do I want to communicate?

28 September 2008


I just discovered a nice feature on Blogger. Go to Dashboard & then under Reading List is Blogs I'm Following. Once you add the blogs, you can see the most recent entries & everyone is just there in a nice little collective. It's kinda nice. :-)

Everyone should follow; maybe you will be followed by a follower you follow.

23 September 2008

"Maxed Out"... Off the Wall... Down the Drain... Make the Call

I'm not just referring to a recent flick I watched, "Maxed Out" (put out in 2006), which tells a lot of stuff we already know but also serves as a reflection of things we might have forgotten about. I must say that I wasn't aware about the magnitude of some folks debts & emotional strain, some to the point of suicide. I know poverty is brutal, but geez. In short, from Regan to G.W.Bush (1983-2005) Social Security has been pillaged of $1450 billion to cover debts. Credit card debt among the American population is horrendous. The flick mentions the Bankruptcy legislative debate & when bill was reformed, MBNA (GW's #1 campaign supporter) helped to rewrite that reform. Accrued debt has robbed public service facilities such as schools, parks, & volunteer departments (rec. meds) of federal & state funds. It mentions that at the consumer credit hearing (2005) the credit card companies only introduced themselves & gave a 4 min. intro. They never had to answer any questions regarding their exploitation on the impoverished population. What to do? They suggest writing to legislation (state & federal) & lenders. Oppose predatory & discriminatory (targeting the poor, college students, etc.) creditors. www.affil.org is the website they recommend. I'm thinking of opting out of Social Security. I thought of doing this in college, but never went through the process of finding out how. Honestly, I'm feeling like I won't see any of it anyway & if I continue to pay it, that means that I'm inadvertently supporting that the administration can use my $ at will for sh*t. I'll post the where-with-all once I find out, for those of you interested also.

Good News is that our President is a genius. He shares such insights with us such as, "It turns out *clasped fingers* that these financial things are inner-related." *insert smarmy looks as if he invented penicillin & we should bow down.* I began this blog post to talk about this current upheaval with Wall Street's & the "leadership" of this country as of late. This is f%#%$#g serious when our Treasury Sec. (Henry Paulson) announces that they want $700 billion to rectify the mortgage crisis. (Why am I not buying a house right now, at the expense of the American taxpayers? When I did almost buy a house this summer, the lender approval still has loopholes & doesn't seem to be changing much from the practices that got us into this in the first place.) The catch to this $700 billion? Don't ask, won't tell. They specifically ask for NO inquiry, no interference, sheer trust that this experimental money pit will work. Because if we can't trust the government, we can't trust anyone (Brainwashing flyer #1). Blarg! Why do we need to come up with this $700 billion anyway; aren't we already into the virtual $ system? Why not just write in the $ & "pay" the bills? {I realize I'm going all over the place here. But, this is my blog, my rant page, & you've chosen to view it. Thanks for hanging with the rip curls.} [For a glance at his speech: http://www.nytimes.com/2008/09/24/business/24txtpaulson.html?_r=1&sq=paulson&st=cse&adxnnl=1&oref=slogin&scp=2&adxnnlx=1222239767-eNLAot3eFNXHSvHYQFemGA]

These are the questions I pose. What can we do as individuals to counter something like this happening? Yes, don't get 12 credit cards & buy groceries & a house with them. I don't even know what to do when I do check the stocks that I have, everything is probably so low to sell right now. I'm trying to use the stock market to my advantage, yet I'm grappling that it's more often using me. How can we seriously uprise against this constant flow of us being informed that day in & day out if the administration decides that we need to burn some $ we should ask no questions? Isn't this communistic? Is this the way we really want to go? No!? Then, what do we do besides vote in the efforts to predict where this country might go? Realistically, the outcome has the potential to determine where the world might go. What else can be done? I'm not posing these questions to put anyone on the spot or to debate about it. Well, I kind of like to debate. Nay, I want to be proactive.

This is the dilemma I'm often finding myself in recently. There is this gargantuan amount of topics that I want to learn about, part of which is politics in both the US & our world at large. I want to know about current affairs, which undoubtedly reflect the underlying history, another thing that my background knowledge is limited with. I'm trying to start where I am & just try to retain the information as it comes along to me or as I'm interested. This is a daunting, exciting & frustrating task, but I'm up for the challenge & I'm hoping to only bite as much as I can chew to be able to retain the info. I'm interested in a lot as of late! Any of you who have knowledge or experiences to share, I wholeheartedly welcome it. Let me give you my existing list (political only, never mind the classic & contemporary literature, health science, pedagogy methods, natural medicine, music, meaning of existence inquisitions :-)... US government & it's inner workings, track records of our presidential candidates, Middle Eastern history (specifically, Iraq, Iran & Palestine/Israel), British influence upon the world... I'll stop there. I'm also facing this mound of questions about how to be proactive, what can we do as individuals & the public at large, right now? I've had the good fortune of being blessed with brilliant friends & family, some that know quite a lot about these things. I've been talking to them a bit & getting resources. Wish for me good counsel & a sound memory to absorb this ever important knowledge. :-) Thanks ahead of time to anyone who wishes to endeavor to help me on this quest of mine.

Ok, I'm stepping down from my soapbox.
(Ahhh... how the exercise of good basketball games can get the mind moving. I must depart for my slumber awaits me.)

17 September 2008


This evening after basketball, I found myself looking for poetry to read on the Internet. Specifically, I looked up EE Cummings & Edgar Allan Poe for some reason. Somehow, I got sucked into an hour of reading poetry aloud, to myself. I was enjoying the feel & sound of the syllables rolling off of my tongue, the height & fall of my voice into the air for no one's pleasure but my own. This was the last poem I read.

Serenade by Edgar Allan Poe

   "So sweet the hour, so calm the time,
I feel it more than half a crime,
When Nature sleeps and stars are mute,
To mar the silence ev'n with lute.
At rest on ocean's brilliant dyes
An image of Elysium lies:
Seven Pleiades entranced in Heaven,
Form in the deep another seven:
Endymion nodding from above
Sees in the sea a second love.
Within the valleys dim and brown,
And on the spectral mountain's crown,
The wearied light is dying down,
And earth, and stars, and sea, and sky
Are redolent of sleep, as I
Am redolent of thee and thine
Enthralling love, my Adeline.
But list, O list,- so soft and low
Thy lover's voice tonight shall flow,
That, scarce awake, thy soul shall deem
My words the music of a dream.
Thus, while no single sound too rude
Upon thy slumber shall intrude,
Our thoughts, our souls- O God above!
In every deed shall mingle, love."